So…I’m pregnant. About 22 weeks along now and we just found out we’re having a boy!
This pregnancy has been remarkably different than my first in some ways, and not so much in others. I’ve spent the first few months very sick, extremely tired, overly sensitive to smells. I lost a bunch of weight, which threw my doctors into a tizzy, and I spent several weeks on a slew of drugs for nausea and heartburn. Then, as if someone flipped a switch, a few days after entering the second trimester my symptoms all but vanished. I’m not off the hook yet though. My last appointment revealed he’s currently in breach position and I have to go in for an extra ultrasound in a couple of weeks to make sure he flips around before the birth.
Also new this time; having a needy toddler full of boundless energy running around the house kinda puts a damper on the whole rest thing too. After putting in 8+ hours at work I’m often too tired to play in the manner Kaylee is used to which is hard on her too. She’s learning to be more patient with me and I’m doing my best to bring my A-game to the few hours we spend together each night. I’m thankful that the timing is such that it coincides with the holidays and I’ll get to spend the last few weeks before the birth on vacation at home.
I find it interesting that I’m much less worried this time around. I drink caffeine with abandon, partake in glass of wine now and then, I even ate a burger that wasn’t well done and a sandwich filled to the brim with lunch meat without batting an eye. I lift things I probably shouldn’t, and have my belly regularly poked, kicked, and plopped on by Kaylee without pause.
I do however still find myself overly concerned with my first-born though. I spend more time than I care to admit pondering how Kaylee will adjust to being a big sister and big life changes in her near future. Should we push the binky issue now and risk possible regression once they’re back in the house again in a few months? Same goes for potty training, and moving to a big girl bed in time to pass the crib down to number 2. I’m so preoccupied with my first baby that I just barely started thinking about the new baby’s room. Last time I already had colors picked out just a few weeks after I found out I was pregnant. Scott went to all of my doctor appointments for Kaylee and has only been to one so far this time around. And, we didn’t even bother talking about names until a half-hearted attempt about a week ago.This poor kid isn’t even born yet and he is already living in his big sister’s shadow.
The truth is we used to have a lot more time, and then we had a baby. Now it feels like there’s not much room left to fit in all the additional stuff that comes along with another. But our calendar is full, not our hearts, and eventually we’ll make room. Right now it’s just easier to give priority to the one who’s already here and worry about the rest later. I have no doubt he’ll have his turn in the spotlight when the time comes.